Tuesday, December 13, 2011

What Color is your emotions?

Once again, I found myself inspired by my good friend, Judith Westerfield's blog.
Creativity to the Max, is a fun and inspirational blog, you should check out if you haven't already!

Today she talked about How to Express Your Emotions Using Colors

So I did.  Most of the time she uses paint with her groups, but it can get a bit messy when in bed, so I used my computer.
I didn't erase anything.
I just picked a brush and a color, and let loose.

This is what I came up with:

Resented are Mad Sad, Glad, Fear, and Disgust.

This could not have come at a better time for me.
I feel like my emotions are all a jumble.
I noticed that Anger (or Mad) resembles a person, and seems to be holding on to Sad.  But Glad is trying hard to over come it.  Fear, feels much bigger in me...but he is hiding in the corner.  Afraid.
I was surprised to find Disgust leaking into everything.

I've been in this bed for so long, I haven't even been out side for 12 days, and the day I went outside, it was to go to the hospital and come home.

I'm sure if I looked back in my journal (other blog) I could figure out the last time I had a really good day, and was able to spend some time away from the house.

I remember the day before Thanksgiving, we braved the grocery store, we needed 2 things.  I almost broke down in tears and had a complete panic attack.  I wasn't feeling bad, not with the vertigo and such like I so very often do...no this was because of my hearing.  I couldn't tell which way sounds were coming from, I kept getting in people's way and didn't know it, people kept coming up behind me and scaring me.   I was in a huge grocery store, with Stuart close by, and I felt so isolated, and overwhelmed by stimuli at the same time.
I may never go in a grocery store again.  (I know that's a bit overly dramatic, but I usually shop at the Farmer's Market or our local Co-Op, both are much smaller, and more manageable.  Even if I did cry the last time I was at the Co-Op.)

Right now, life is a bit overwhelming.  I want to be mad at someone.  I feel I'm taking it out on Stuart, and he's really trying his best.  But I need to be mad at someone..I need to get some of this anger out.
I will...but I don't think I need to let it all out at once.  If I did, well, they might describe our house as another Chernobyl. Complete Melt Down.

Thanks Judith for giving me what I needed today.
I'd love to see how other's express their feelings with color....so send me some, or show them on your blog.
You can do it, it doesn't take long, and it gives you something tangible to focus those emotions on.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

I can't believe it's been so long!

Wow, I simply can't believe it has been so long since I posted.

I really don't have a lot to share.

I colored a tree...I like it a lot...I think it will be an e-Christmas Card.  I'm simply not up to doing much more than that.  : )

The doctor says the surgery went well, I had constant vertigo for a week, and it's still coming and going, but I'm much better than I was a week ago!!

Here's my cute little tree:
I drew this little tree in ink, and colored it in Photoshop.

Here is a work in progress.
I showed you  a HOPE design, but I simply didn't like it, I felt he letter for HOPE got lost in the design, so I started over.
HOPE - before coloring.
I will be hand coloring this version, as I plan to give it as a gift.
(and we all know my color printer kind of sucks!)
This one has many of the same doodles in it the first one did,
but I changed some things, and think I like this one better.
I didn't use a lot of black areas, I will probably add some later,
 but wasn't sure what I might want to color.
So this doesn't stand alone very well,
the colored version is on it's way.
There are a few more things I could add, not much, the recovery from this surgery has been brutal.
I will post them as soon as I'm up to using the scanner.  Yes, I know it's not that hard, but I do have to get out of bed.  : )  Not something I've been able to do much lately.

Hope to post more, and come around to see all of you soon.

May your holidays be happy, and filled with joy!
Remember, Christmas isn't about all the stress, hustle, and bustle...it's about giving.  I'm not talking about presents, I mean giving of yourself.  Showing people you care.  Be nice to a stranger, help your neighbor....  
Be Happy and you will light up someone's day!
and remember try to keep this spirit of Christmas all year long!

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Wrapping up November.

I may not have been able to post every day, but I did try to create, something, everyday.
Sometimes even the smallest doodle can be a great accomplishment.

My husband has only once asked me to draw something for him.
He asked for a butterfly design.
I'm pretty proud of this one....he likes it a lot too.
Next, I'll play with some colors for it, but I really like it as it is.
(This took me a couple of days to complete.)

This Doodle was done in three parts, over three days.
I can tell exactly where one day started and another began.
The moods definitely change from one segment to another, and it has little cohesion.

Some of these things I'm surprised I'm showing,
 but even silly little critter sketches can help me feel better on days when it's difficult to even move my head.

Thinking about headaches, and surgery coming up tomorrow.
This was a very therapeutic sketch.

I just drew a shape, and it became this Silly Goose.
I love the cute little expression he has about getting a gift.

Another sketch from a shape I drew.
I can't decide if she's in pain, singing, depressed....or perhaps she just slipped and bonked her head. 

Barbershop Quartet Singer.
Another drawing that started a just a little shape, and turned into this funny man.

Starting to think about Christmas.

Happy Holidays!

With this, and the next couple of sketches, I was experimenting a little with some portraiture.
I must say, it's nearly impossible for me to get proportions right when I'm lying down.
(see how the eyes are straight)

This was still in progress,
She would end up with a cool design cloth draped over her head, but the eyes are too far apart, I may never get back to her.

I don't even know why I'm sharing this one with you.
She is so out of proportion.
I admit the angle is a bit odd, but there are so many corrections needed for this piece,
I think it'll probably be time to just start over.
 There were a few more sketches, and a couple of things that are still in progress that I've been working on a little.  My ladies - Nature, Freedom, and the Mystery lady - have all hit points where I'm not sure what to do next.  I keep trying things on the computer to see if I'll like it before working on the original drawing, and nothing is working like I want it to so far.  But I have been working on them....I'm sure they'll show me who they want to become soon.

Tomorrow is surgery day.  (I guess technically today, I didn't notice it was so late!)
I have to be at the hospital at 11:30am.  Surgery is at 2pm.  Not sure how much art I'll be getting done for the first few days.  Hopefully, at least a silly little sketch or two!
But I need to remember to
You may remember this drawing I posted earlier in it's black and white version.
I think the color adds a lot!
For those of you who don't know, and are somewhat interested.  The surgery I'm having tomorrow is on my left ear, and will hopefully help control the vertigo I've been having.  I had this same surgery on my right ear nearly 2 years ago, we think it helped control the vertigo being caused by that ear, if it works for this ear, I could be looking at more days up right!!

The surgery is called Endolymphatic Sac Enhancement Surgery.  The endolymphatic sac is located right under and too the back side of your ear.  For people with Meniere's this sac fills with too much fluid and that creates havoc with the delicate "balance" of things.  (pun intended)
You can go here http://www.pehni.com/patient_ed/endolymphaticsac.htm  to read a little more about the surgery.  It's very hard to find exact information about it on the internet.  I think that is because different doctors do this surgery in different ways.  Some decompress the sac, some add a shunt, some simply remove the bone and create a larger area for the endolymphatic sac so it can expand without leaking.  This is what my doctor does.

Looking forward to creating more as I heal.