One night while I was up with slosh head but not completely spinning, I wrote this:
|image by oldmanriver Deviant Art|
I live in a different world than you.
My body tries to exist in your world.
But my brain, my inner being,
does not belong.
Her world is constantly in motion,
ever spinning, faster and faster...
I try to stay in your world,
My inner world frightens me.
Torn in two.
Part cannot exist in this world,
the pull from the other is so strong.
Part cannot exist in the horrors of the other.
Ever searching to become whole.
To no longer be afraid.
Ever searching to understand.
Do I belong in the world in which I feel safer?
Or am I doomed to the world of constant motion?
The spinning, spinning, constant spinning.
Never feeling solid ground beneath my feet.
Where do I belong?
Or am I ever fated to live a life with a foot in each world?
(living with Vertigo)